So... this here interweb-ey dating "thing"

I have, at various times in the last few five eight years, found myself to be single.  This was always sometimes my choice, sometimes my horrible poor choices in men and sometimes their choice (I know!)(Can you even IMAGINE?)

Thus, I have had, let's just say, some "experience"  with the PLETHORA (seriously, there are a kajillion)(totally a number) of sites out there.   Because I am also blessed with perennially single friends (Errm, no offense)(It's not us, it's them)(really)we have collectively visited ALL the sites.  (well.... let's just say, there are some which are more "specific" in terms of what the, ummm, "participants" desire)(Yeah, we haven't dabbled in those)(It takes all kinds, evidently)

A-hem.

So.  I now have the research, experience and history to speak authoritatively (trained professional here, people) on said sites.  (Opinions are my own)(Well...and my single girlfriends)(wine may have been involved)

Ready?  (I'll be brief)(stop laughing)

1. eHarmony.  Realize too late (while at work) that one REALLY needs to set aside a half day for the quiz.  Half-ass  pay detailed minimal attention to the questions.  Answer them as fast as you can. They.go.on.forever.  (Oh, you say to me, "but this is how we get matched on ALL the levels")(Uh-huh) Send in your fee(NOT small)(But I'm getting Married! you say to me)(Uh-huh) Submit Profile.

.......wait for the magic......
 
find future husband.  Seven.States.Away.(true story)(well, except for the future husband part)

2. Plenty of Fish.  FREE! (yay!)(what frugal men must be on this site)(until they solicit umm... let's just say, "services") OMG. Cannot.Log.Off.Fast.Enough.The End. 

3. Singlesnet.  This is tricky.  It's free. (sorta) One of the 2 parties needs to be a paying member in order to communicate (advice: Always make the boy pay)(Of course I'm liberated)(But let's not start a precedent here, mmmkay?) Also? Why, why, why so many men without.their.shirts.on?

4. OKCupid.  To be fair, friends have had luck here (and GOODIE for them, we say!)(not sure who this sudden "we" is I am referencing)(Moving on)  I had a lovely dinner with a man 22 years my senior.(He really was darling)(not quite my cup of tea)( He actually DID take me out for tea)(true story) 

5. Chemistry.  Trying to be eHarmony, but a bit racier (see above, re: this are ONLY my opinions)(don't get mad Chemistry people) More quizzes. More "deep" questions.  Also?  Gentlemen? A five paragraph essay? A bit much (see above: covertly doing this at work)

6. Match.  Yup. The biggie.  The one we all know about. (The one I KEEP forgetting to tell Paypal to STOP paying) Meh, it's fine. Same men, different screen names. (yawn)(but, *bonus* you can block those gentlemen (term used VEERRY loosely) requesting "services") Oh! and they have "mixers!" Get together! Meet ALL the singles! At cooking class! And the Bowling Alley!(shoot me)(it's just not my thing)(but really, go!)(mingle to your heart's content!) 

7. Christian Mingle.  OK.  Sure.  God has a plan, I get that (No, I really do) Errrm... but when one sees the IDENTICAL profile one has seen on four.other.sites. (I swear I don't stalk)(It was research) (sheesh) with the obligatory:  "May God Bless You" added? And sometimes, for flair? A scripture verse?(really, guys?)(a LITTLE effort?)(too much to ask?) 

Whew.  So, there's my initial recap. (still reading?)(you TOTALLY get a sticker) 

Up Next?  Helpful Hints for the Internet Dater.(for realz)(I am NOTHING if not informative)